I wanna take a ride on your biscuit stick! Are you wooed yet? - Asian Snack Challenge

The Asian Snack Challenge was well deserved tonight. It was interrupted last week by some small event called The State Budget. And I delivered a presentation to my class tonight. My friend and I earned tonight's Snacks. Plus, I have a new iPhone that I can use to take bad and blurry photographs. And to celebrate, this is a mammoth blog entry.

Key observations (without pictures) of the Asian Snack Challenge tonight:
- squawking plastic chickens have sold by the dozen since the last blog entry about the Asian Snack Challenge. It is clear that people who have read this blog have coveted a plastic chicken.
- giant lollypops were excessive.
- there is simply too much Pocky.

Enjoy some pictures and other observations before I begin the commentary:

This is cute. A can that looks like a fruit with a face on it.

I have a distate for thin milk at the best of times.

Can I get a body like that? I shudder to think what's in the ingredients, even though it is the only product in store that has an accurate title.

Peacock biscuits. Are they blue and green?

When you eat these you will receive instant beauty.

'She was working in a bridal shop in Flushing, Queens,
'Til her boyfriend kicked her out in one of those crushing scenes.
What was she to do? Where was she to go? She was out on her fanny...
So over the bridge from Flushing to the Sheffield's door.
She was there to sell make-up, but the father saw more.
Fran as the Nanny She had style! She had flair! She was there.
That's how she became the Nanny!'

Alcoholic Asian Snack?

This drink has 'sweat' in its title. Apparently it replenishes moisture lost through exercise. Phew! It's not actual sweat!

Attention Uni Students: 40 packets of MiGoreng for $14.99! Would you like Pocky with that?

Romantic snacks




We had an audience as we photographed our haul tonight. Our Asian Snack Challenge was impinging on the ability of commuters to sit down. Impinging was a concept we learned in last semester's class. Now we can apply it!


My friend had Munchy's mini cheese. The size of the biscuit is not to scale with the picture on the packet. They were quite nice. A bit like the Arnott's Country Cheese biscuits sandwiched with some fake cheese filling.

He also had Pocky. Dark chocolate on biscuit stick. I love how literal the descriptions are.

I kept singing the Lady Gaga song Love Game but made a parody out of the Pocky situation.

'Let's have some fun, this beat is sick
I wanna take a ride on your biscuit stick'.

I know. I am ashamed I know the words and tune to a Gaga song enough to make a parody out of it.

Still, we laughed and laughed.

It was a family night tonight. Not on account of the participants of the Asian Snack Challenge, but the theme of my components of the Challenge. And to team with the theme, it was economical. $10.39 for four substantial snacks. Family friendly. With that budget, I am ready to provide for a family.

I bought a crushed strawberry drink.

It was actually delicious. Really.

There was this. Product title gold. Beer Mate.

Beer Mate is like crispy seaweed, only flimsier. Also tastes like fish food.


Apparently, you can enjoy Beer Mate anytime anywhere!

Translation of blurry image:
'Enjoy with beer
Enjoy on TV watching
Enjoy on picnic
Dietary snack for women'

Hahahaha. I assume the women don't drink beer, they just live on this Beer Mate. Sexist much?

We decided it is called Beer, Mate. 'Get on that Beer, Mate'.

And another product title gold. Wife Cake.



Like on most nights of the Asian Snack Challenge, I found the packets difficult to open. I could not open the Wife Cakes, and nor could my friend.
'Do you have a knife?' he asked me.
'Nope'.

'You must be the only one in Melbourne not to carry a knife on you'.

I opened and ate my Wife Cake at home. Wow. Wife Cakes are something else. Like a savoury biscuit filled with something spicy, something fishy and something sweet. The front of the packet says Spicy Salted Shrimp flavour.

I can't quite get my tastebuds around it.

The ingredients are unidentifiable without Googling. Tepung Gandum, Tepung Nutmeg, Gula, Minyak Masak, Garam, Bikian and Telur. If I was doing the MasterChef taste challenge for the ingredients of Wife Cake, I would fail. Dismally.

I also bought Hello Kitty marshmallow cones. Because they looked cute.


They came in strawberry, melon and orange flavour. They were like eating a bucket of sugar. I ate one.


Inside the Hello Kitty marshmallow cone packet, there was a bookmark.

'Yay! It's a bookmark. Oh good, something practical'.

I have a lot of leftovers tonight. The Snacks just weren't that great. I just wasn't that into them. My friend said I can serve them to potential suitors.

He suggested Wife Cakes are ideal for potential suitors. Never mind the taste.

I disagree.Potential suitors will be relying on my good looks alone to be wooed. Wife cakes just won't do it for them.

Beer, Mate is ideal to ply the potential suitor. It will also need to be combined with my good looks, because quite frankly, what potential suitor enjoys fish food?

See picture below for example of my Beer, Mate combined with my good looks.

Are you wooed yet?

And Hot Kid is the result of the potential suitor!


Next week is our last Asian Snack Challenge. Because it is our last class of uni EVER! Well, there is the small project known as the thesis to do, but no more uni classes. My leftovers from tonight will probably get me through the thesis, actually. I will be sad to end the Challenge.

Before I leave you, let me tell you, the Asian Snack Challenge has been commissioned for bigger and better things outside of this blog.

I know.
I didn't think there was a bigger or better thing than this blog.

But alas! Look out for the Asian Snack Challenge going global. I am serious.

My friend and I predict it will be featured on CNBC Asia soon. Stay tuned.