Keeping it real: me without my face on. And the most embarrassing thing I've done on the Internet.

A couple of weeks ago, I got home to find I had no hot water. The storms we had caused the tank's thermostat to trip, and I was without hot water overnight. It was fixed in less than 24 hours of the discovery. So thankful!

It's imperative I have a shower twice a day - in the morning to remove the skin that's grown overnight and during the day. The longer I leave it, the more sore it gets - cracks and peeling and a general discomfort. Ichthyosis can be inconvenient when I'm inconvenienced!

I went to my friend Nicole's house to shower, she lives close by. Lifesaver! Poor Adam braved a cold shower.

 

So this is me, the morning I had no hot water, before I'd put my face on - or taken the previous night's face off? I did put pre-shower paraffin on so I am much less dry than when I just wake up, it helps with the face washing. The steam in the shower combined with the paraffin softens my skin. Gosh my hair is messy!

I don't do anything or let anyone see me before a morning shower. I'm a bit miserable, a bit mucky eyed and longing to freshen up.

I Facebooked about overcoming the embarrassment of being seen first thing in the morning when I stayed in hostels overseas:

I don't usually let anyone see me before I have had a morning shower.

You see, I don't wake up looking like the photos I post here, or how you see me in person. I must put my face on to greet the world - or more realistically, take my overnight face off. Ichthyosis means the skin renews a lot overnight and I wake up with a very scaly, very hard to move face. Maybe like Botox meets facial peel. Hideous.

So it's been a big feat for me to forgo some of that privacy these past six weeks - staying in hostels and with other people. And it hasn't been so bad. I still don't look at people in the eye before I have had a shower but I can manage to go out of my room into the bathroom past people.

Hurdled jumped.

I believe that is the first photo I've ever put on the Internet where I don't look and feel my best. Hurrah for a supportive community giving me the confidence to do this!

When I put that photo up on Facebook and Instagram the day after the hot water went out, I asked my community to share a photo of themselves without their face on. And they did, showing their natural beauty, their vulnerable side. Solidarity.

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And also, just to make this post doubly full of self consciousness, here's a video I did - lipsynching to a Darren Hayes song - for Eden. She's had a really tough time lately and she's asked for people to take part in her international lipsynching competition - to bring some laughter her (and our) way. This is the most embarrassing thing I've done on the Internet. Look away now.