11 July 2016

On the weight of expectations.


I'm not going to get it right all the time.

Even though I'm an activist.

Even though I'm an advocate.

Even though I have a disability.


I won't live up to your expectations.

They're sometimes lofty.

There's a standard for me, yet a standard for others.


I will fail you.

But the weight of my own failure in my eyes is thousandfold.

I overthink and aim to please, always.


I won't be polite.

I'll swear.

And get angry.

I'm not going to respond to every injustice with dignity.

Because I'm tired.


I'll sometimes contradict my values and what I've written previously.

You can Google, and catch me out.

But I'll keep trying my best.


I am human.

Just like them,

Human, just like everyone else.

As you keep telling me.


I'll make mistakes.

And I'll apologise when I've hurt people.

But I'll make mistakes.

Just like you.



1 comment:

  1. Very well written Carly. I always say to people who complain about the way I advocate or my activism activities that if they want their opinion heard then maybe they should give it a go themselves rather than complaining to me that I'm doing it wrong. Love ya to bits xo


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