Music I've been missing - Pink, The one that got away/Adele, Someone like you

Each Queen's Birthday long weekend I get nostalgic. About a boy. Of course. To my detriment, my memory's like a really well detailed diary. And I can remember conversations, looks, movements and events like they've just taken place. I realised that this event happened four years ago. And for perhaps three subsequent years I teetered between being glad and regretting it ever happened. (This teetering still applies now - similar situation, different boy.) Time flies. And the lyrics of songs remind me of that Queen's Birthday long weekend 2007. Pink and Adele is the music I've been missing. The songs are about love lost, the one that got away, and holding onto memories.

When I hear this song I think about what may have been.

"You were mine
In the back of my mind
Oh just for one night
Just for a while..."

The presenter who announces this song talks about a singer who you've never met being able to describe how you felt during an exact moment in your life. Adele seems to know exactly how I feel about love.

"I had hoped you'd see my face,
And that you'd be reminded that for me it isn't over,

Nevermind, I'll find someone like you,
I wish nothing but the best for you, too,
Don't forget me, I beg..."

That Queen's Birthday long weekend was spent at my parents' house. I traveled up in the car on the Friday night with some friends who also have family there. My Dad had just had an operation. My best male friend called me on the Saturday night asking me to come over on the Sunday night.

I had been friends with this boy for years - since the final year of school. He is the same age as me. We worked together. I'd always thought he was cute but I was only ever interested in someone else I worked with. When I moved to Melbourne we grew closer - talking on the phone for ages. I'd hang out with him when I went back home. He was funny, cute and intelligent. One day I realised I really liked him. I think the day I realised I liked him was in 2005 when he came to stay with me in Melbourne and we saw a concert together. There was a moment between us - that never went far - plus he sat through a Savage Garden DVD to help me connect my DVD player to my TV.

Of course I never said anything about my feelings to him. I would just sit and watch the footy or cricket to be with him. When I moved back with my parents in 2006, we'd hang out together almost every Friday night, watching the Chaser and listening to music. He took me out for dinner on my last night before I moved back to Melbourne. I hadn't fallen for someone like I did for him for a while.

So that weekend in 2007. I was quite sore so I had told Mum I wouldn't be home late. I drove her car to his place. I took him some beer to thank him for having me. We did the usual arguing about what we'd have for dinner. We went out for Mexican. He was happy. His football team had won. He'd been drinking all afternoon. He let me drive his car. I had one wine at dinner, he had margaritas, and would only let me have a sip as he knew I'd get drunk on just the smell of it. He kept on telling me he thought the waitress was hot. After dinner we went to the pub - the one we'd hang out at after work all those years ago. It was a freezing night. We stood by the fire but an older woman - a boiler as my Dad would say - was eyeing him off and so I asked him if we could sit down in a booth. A guy who recognised me from pre-school came up to talk to us for ages. When he left, the boy was telling me how hot the girl at the bar was. I'd had enough.

I told him he can't talk to me like I am his mate. He said I am his mate. I said I know, but I am also a girl. I said he can't take me out for dinner, pay for a $100 meal, buy me drinks, let me drive his car, and tell me he thinks the barmaid is hot. He didn't see this as a problem. I said he doesn't know how I feel about him, and walked out of the pub - with his car keys. He had to come with me of course.

When we got back to his house we were cold and warmed up by the heater. There was a lot of flirting. He asked me to cut his hair. I did. I told him that I bet the barmaid wouldn't have cut his hair. And then it happened. We had this massive playfight and fits of laughter. He kissed me. Several times.

At 3 am his house phone rang. He told me to answer it. It was my Mum. Worried sick that I'd not come home. And I was at the awkward moment of not knowing whether I was going to stay the night. I didn't want to ask him.

We kissed some more. And then he asked me to stay. And then he said he couldn't do this. And that he hoped he "hadn't fucked things up between us".

I got up to leave. He told me he liked me a lot but I was "too fucking special". Compliment? I looked him in the eyes and told him I'd loved him for a very long time.

We've only spoken of that night once since it happened. I've seen him twice - both times were very difficult. I once got drunk after some dwarfs called me ugly and said "I know you don't love me back but some dwarfs called me ugly...".

We still talk. Things aren't as awkward anymore but the flow and length of conversation is not the same.  He told me once about a girl he'd been seeing. I never wished him well then, but maybe I would now. I can't bring myself to talk to him about the current boy I love. It makes me sad.

Four years have passed and I still wish we still had the friendship we once had.  Last Christmas he sent me a text, telling me how lucky he is to have me in his life.

The one that got away. The story of my late 20s.

Fucking Perfect and more music I've been listening to

I have two big announcements to be made on this blog in the next day or two. Stay tuned. Or should I say, Tune into Radio Carly!

For now I will leave you with a few of my current favourite songs. Apologies for the insubstantial blog entry. Very tired. But so excited, too!

Music I've been missing - P!nk

I'm a recent convert to Pink. I like her heartfelt lyrics and catchy tunes. I can relate to her lyrics so much. Given that I'm not a huge fan of top 40 commercial music, Pink's a surprising part of my music collection. She's the music I've been missing.

In 2007 I rang Nova to enter a concert ticket competition. On the day I called I did not win, but two weeks later, I received a call telling me I'd won a Pink CD, tickets to her concert and a pink scooter. I did not get the scooter, I opted for the cash.

I was reluctant to go to the Pink concert as I was not familiar with her music. But I went, and I loved her. I loved her acrobatics, her strong voice, her humour and I think she has a great body.

I enjoyed her I'm not dead album, went back to listen to her older music and discovered I was a fan.

I went to her concert last year too, and loved it as much as the first time I saw her live. I had won tickets to see her a second time but ended up selling my tickets as I'd just come out of hospital.

Here are two of my favourite Pink songs.



This song, The one that got away, is a favourite of mine. It reminds me of all the unrequited loves I've had. Ok maybe just one unrequited love.

Sigh.

I'm feeling sore, and introspective, and Pink's music is the perfect way to reflect.

Best gigs of 2009

I am quite a big live music fan. 2009, though, has been quite sparse for me in terms of the gigs I've seen.

As it's nearing the end of the year, I'm going to think back on my most memorable gigs I've been to. This is pretty much in order of my favourites, and may not include all gigs.

1) Sound Relief - 14 March, MCG

In support of the Black Saturday bushfires, a massive concert was held in Melbourne and Sydney. Jet, Kings of Leon, Bliss n Eso, Paul Kelly, Kasey Chambers, Crowded House, Coldplay, Midnight Oil and Hunters and Collectors were a few of the acts. My favourite acts of the day were Kings of Leon, Paul Kelly, Crowded House and John Farnham with Coldplay. It poured with rain the whole day in Melbourne, apart from when Crowded House played Four Seasons in One Day. It was brilliant to see Hunters and Collectors live as I'd not seen them before. All of the bands got into the cause, giving it their all. And the spirit of Australia was in force - I loved how we banded together to support such massive tragedy. When John Farnham and Coldplay's You're The Voice was screened from Sydney, the whole MCG were up dancing and singing. One of the other things I recall was when Paul Kelly sang Leaps and Bounds and he sang the line ín the MCG''and the crowd roared. We were IN the MCG!! It was an amazing feeling. I felt so proud to be Australian and to be supporting the bushfire appeal.

2) Kings of Leon - 13 March, Rod Laver Arena

After loving Because of the Times, and then Only By the Night, I was so excited that I had a chance to see Kings of Leon live. I was a latecomer to their music, and it was only after this concert that I began to listen and love their first albums. I was fortunate enough to win tickets from Nova 100 radio and the tickets were in the general admission area of Rod Laver. My friend and I were lucky enough to get a view from the second row. I've been in the front mosh before (Placebo and Screaming Jets were the roughest) but wasn't sure what to expect with Kings of Leon. It was exhilerating and exhausting at the same time. Some girl, possibly high on drugs, was throwing herself around and pushing and hitting people. I was very annoyed the security were more interested in stopping me from taking photos than getting this girl out of the crowd. It took me and others around me four songs to get her out. After that I had a much better time, but I was overheating so I wasn't able to stay in the front of the mosh for the last two songs - my favourite - Knocked Up and Manhattan. Other songs that were great were Black Thumbnail, Charmer, Closer, and Taperjean Girl. However, the next day was Sound Relief and I was very tired in mind and body after those two gigs.

3) Steve Poltz - 20 June, Northcote Social Club

I was first introduced to Steve Poltz at a Bob Evans gig in May. He is a brilliant storyteller, comedian and generally all round nice guy. Did you know he's written songs for Jewel? He wrote You Were Meant for Me. On this particular night he played for almost two and a half hours, and the concert was recorded. I purchased the CD at the end. He was amazing. The crowd was enthralled! a busload of people came from Flowerdale, they were survivors of the Black Saturday fires. He got some of them up on stage. It was brilliant. His ability to tell stories is a gift - if you ever get the chance to see him, do so. He's playing on 2 January at Northcote Social Club and I will be seeing him! Can't wait.

4) Bob Evans and Steve Poltz - 21 May, Corner Hotel

This was the night I was introduced to Steve Poltz. He played five songs before Bob Evans and I was captivated. I remember giving him a note saying he was my favourite support act ever.

Bob Evans was amazing too. I love his charisma, his passion for music, and his song writing. There was one point where he got down in the crowd during Pasha Bulker and he did a guitar solo. I helped wind his guitar lead back on to the stage. It was a great night, but I think I had something on early the next day!

5) Bob Evans - 26 May, Billy Hyde Music instore

Bob Evans played a short set at Billy Hyde promoting his album and Gibson guitars. It was beautiful - acoustic and heartfelt. I was the first audience member there and Kevin (Bob Evans) was there warming up and we had a bit of a chat. They got me sme water and I got a good spot. Disappointingly (but lucky for my friends and I), there weren't many people there to support Bob Evans. But it was personal and intimate. After the show, he signed a poster for me, I asked him for the lyrics to my favourite song - Hand Me Downs. He didn't remember the words, so I offered to play it on my iPod, but he asked me to sing them - hahaha. The lyrics are 'Í got nothing darlin', all I got are broken wings, and I need you more than ever now...'. Steve Poltz was there looking on and he recognised me from the May Bob Evans gig, so he said hi. And then when he parked behind my car, we had a laugh.

6) Pink - 22 June, Rod Laver Arena

Is there anything this woman can't do?! She sings, she dances, she does acrobatics! Wow! A couple of years ago I won some tickets (thanks again, Nova 100) and was quite hesitant in going to see her as I wasn't a huge fan of her music. But I was in awe and became a fan. When 2009 shows were announced, my manager asked me to get tickets for her as well, so I booked some for both of us. I was so excited to be going with her! This year she didn't disappoint - the costumes were amazing, the set list was satisfying and her acrobatics were thrilling. I loved it! So glad I went! I had won some more tickets in addition to the ones I purchased (again from Nova 100), but unfortunately due to my operation, I was too unwell to see Pink a second time this year. She is amazing. If ever you get the chance to see her - do it!!

So those are a few of the gigs I have been to in 2009. The most memorable ones. Other honourable mentions were - Bertie Blackman at the Toff in Town, Bob Evans for Myspace Music and Paul Kelly at the Melbourne Writers Festival.

In 2010 I'm booked for Steve Poltz, The Temper Trap, and Angus and Julia Stone. Long live the live music and I hope in 2010 there will be more of it!