Hitting the big time.

This was published a few days ago but Blogger broke and so the post was removed (by Blogger, not me). I received a number of supportive comments on the initial post - thank you - but these have gone too. I will try to repost them below when I get time. I also saw a number of Google searches in my Stat Counter that stated I am a narciccist and a red Teletubbie. Thank you, too, for thinking of me. Onwards and upwards. Here's the post.

I think I can say that last week I hit the big time. Or at least I hit the big time online. Maybe it's premature of me to say this, or vain, but I think I have. You can disagree ;)

While I didn't win the Best Australian Blogs competition (and being nominated as a finalist was in fact hitting the big time) - but a big congrats to those who did win -  a couple of things have happened to validate my thoughts. It also got me thinking about my ability as a writer to critique performances, and also be critiqued myself.

It started when I received a response via Twitter from Megan Washington following my critical review of her concert at the Forum.

That was a pretty big moment for me. Having the singer I just wrote about, that I was unimpressed with, writing back. Thanks Washington!

Wow - it's pretty flattering that she took the time to read my review and tell me her (brief) opinion. I enjoy how the internet brings everyone closer and allows for a rather immediate interaction between fans and celebrities. I received lots of great feedback from friends and strangers on my blog and Facebook - thanks so much. I was quite nervous in writing and publishing the review. But I am glad I did - I am glad I provided an alternative, balanced and honest opinion. I have always doubted my ability as a music reviewer - I don't believe I know enough about music - but after this, maybe I am not so bad after all.

The other thing that has happened has been a series of questionable Google searches. I have had strange ones in the past - 'why does Carly Findlay wear vaseline?' was funny - if the googler knew me, why not ask me personally? But these recent ones take the cake.

'Carly Findlay nude'. 'Carly Findlay bra'. 

'Carly Findlay breasts'. They're great. And I don't blame anyone for ogling googling them :P

And Hayley alerted me to 'Carly Finlay (sic) I am a slut'. Hmmmm. Really?

My initial reaction after the first Google sighting was a lot of laughter and to share the news on Facebook:

I checked my blog stats and someone googled me twice: 'Carly Findlay nude' and 'Carly Findlay bra'. Does this mean I've really made it? 

And

It is a bit creepy. But on the upside... Hahah I've always wanted my body to be admired. Next time someone comments on my appearance for being red or ugly etc I can say 'there are people out there searching for what I look like naked'!

I was finding it quite amusing. Ok, equal parts creepy and amusing. And the searches may not even be me. (But I'd secretly like to think the searches were!)

And then I received this response from a contact on Facebook:

I pray, for your sake, that it's not someone with a fetish for people with skin conditions/disorders/diseases. Or a stalker. Because that would be really creepy indeed. Maybe you have a secret admirer.

I was mightily pissed off. The person that wrote this was a contact I'd made through a mutual appreciation of a singer. I told her I was very annoyed. Hurt actually. While there was some slight concern there, I was hurt that she'd thought that people would want to see me nude to ridicule/fetishise over my skin, especially when I receive so much support from friends and strangers about my appearance. Brain. Fingers. Disengaged. I deleted and blocked her from all my social networking sites shortly after. She'd said a few questionable things so this event was good justification to delete and block.

The search for 'Carly Finlay I am a slut' baffled me. Firstly, my surname is spelled wrong. And I haven't opened my legs for a man for quite some time. I could tell you the exact date, but I am not that kind of girl. Hell, I haven't even shown off some cleavage in the hope to draw peoples' eyes from my 'sunburn' to my boobs in recent months. Really. I am that content with my life right now.

Maybe this search wasn't about me. But it sure made me laugh and say 'what the fuck?' - indeed. What the fuck? about this search and about what fuck(s) I've been getting for someone to think I am a slut. Hold on... on re-reading the search term, maybe they're declaring to me they're a slut and want me to come running?? Again, WTF???, and maybe this search wasn't about me.

I get it. Weird things happen because of the internet. And there are weird people on the internet. I get recognised from my blog and TV work. Someone on the train interrupted a conversation to tell me he recognised me from a picture on the internet. My friend and I laughed and laughed, and thought it was a real novelty. I am not freaked out by these Google searches. They are a little weird but I don't feel threatened or unsafe. I put myself out there on the internet and accept I am going to encounter a few questionable reactions and responses. Fortunately I have only only received one yucky comment about my appearance and that's a feat considering how many posts I've written, and also how many people I encounter in real life and online.

These events that made me think that I've hit the big time show me a few things:

That other people are just as curious about me as I am about celebrities.

That celebrities value critical opinion.

Not to take the internet too seriously.

And that by me putting my opinion and life out there for all to read means I am just as vulnerable to criticism, curiousity and weird online behaviour as the celebrities. (I am not thinking or saying I am one, it's just made me think realise I am more identifiable now.)

I think it's really interesting that the opportunities I've created for myself online allows a dialogue with so many people - celebrities, and people who may or may not be thinking about what I look like naked.

Googled

It's strange.

I am very Web 2.0 savvy.

I have this blog. I tell the world a lot about me here. Obviously not everything, but I am fairly honest and cover a wide range of topics. Friends and strangers comment on my blog. I visit other blogs regularly, and comment occasionally.

I use Facebook each day. Share photos with my friends. Update my status to tell my friends what I am thinking. I currently have 751 friends on Facebook. Admittedly I probably only speak to 100 of these on Facebook? But I would know 700 of them in real life.

I also use Twitter. I keep in touch with what's happening in the world this way. Get peoples' opinions (in 140 characters or less) on Twitter. I do know some tweeters, and have met some new people through Twitter. But the majority of tweeters I allow to see my feed I don't know in real life.

Myspace is still there. My blog still exists. I am 'friends' with a number of bands. I don't visit often.

And I am keen to study Web 2.0 in the subjects for my Masters degree. I researched social networking in a hierarchical organisation. I also researched the way people with chronic illness and disability use the Web 2.0 to mobilise themselves. And my thesis will be along these lines too.

So, yeah, I am quite into using Web 2.0 and merging my real life with the Internet.

I've had this blog for about two months. I have put a visitor counter on it about a month ago. I am amazed by the number of hits I get per day. I believe 486 was the most I have had. Wow. Flattering. I am also intrigued by where my visitors are from - Hong Kong, Latvia, Italy, Barbados, Denmark, Wodongs, to name a few. And I like to see how they reached my page - usually via Facebook or the Vogue Forums.

Sometimes I can see that someone who is not my friend on Facebook but a friend of a friend has accessed my blog. Even though I am set to private on all of my setting bar some photos. That surprised me to know that privacy on Facebook is not that secure. Well, I guess it shouldn't have surprised me - the media goes on about it all the time.

I am also a little disconcerted to know how many people Google me. Ok, it's not that many. But five Googles a week is surprising. People have Googled 'Carly Findlay', 'Carly Findlay Melbourne', 'Radio Carly irrelevant' and 'Carly Findlay ichthyosis'.

Of course they've Googled other things like 'Rob Thomas concert' or Marie Claire Jennifer Hawkins', and I always marvel how this Google search brings them to my blog. I am always relieved to know that someone searching 'Britney porn video' or a much more explicit term is not directed to my blog!

But I am always surprised, and a little creeped out that people Google my name and location and illness. I think most of the Googles may be because people may have forgotten the linky to my blog - hopefully - but then I wonder why someone is Googling my name at 11:08 pm.

I probably shouldn't worry, because after all, I created this blog to share my thoughts with the world, and I belong to other social networking sites on which I share my life with.

And I admit, I have Googled peoples' names too. Mostly my own name, but yes, I have done some Googling.


But to be Googled when I am not a celebrity is one part flattering, two parts uncomfortable. I wonder who these Googlers are.

To those who keep a blog and have a visitor counter, does this worry you too?

Doodle 4 Google - Happy Australia Day

How beautiful is this?! It was designed by a 12 year old school girl, Jessie Du, for the Doodle 4 Google Australia Day competition.



(Image from Doodle 4 Google)

There was some controversy surrounding the editing of the original image to remove the Aboriginal flag due to copyright.

Either way, I think it is so clever and beautiful, and I enjoyed Googling today.

Happy Australia Day!